first of all. she rearranges shit. like little things. like moving my glasses in the bathroom, which is a really terrible thing to do to someone who's almost blind. you take your contacts out in the evening, reach for where your glasses typically are, and a moment of panic followed by annoyed careful face along the sink search ensues. she moves little things on the coffee table, like rearranges the candles or the vases as if the arrangement offends her. of course, it's likely she's just rushing to clean shit up, but it feels a bit judgmental, like my feng shui is off and must be corrected, which sometimes makes me feel like i've hired my mother.
second. i usually try to tidy things up before she comes. to make her work easier, but to also minimize the mess i really need to be minimizing as an adult anyways. on a very rare occasion, if i'm rushing in the morning, i may forget to pick up the clothes i've left on the floor the night before. the cleaning lady, in a masterful neat way, makes a point of folding whatever she finds. what would make one pick up dirty socks and random shirts from the floor and neatly fold them on the chair? i have no idea. it's a nice gesture, i guess, but weird because i've really never had this impulse of findings clothing items on the floor and deciding, oh, let me fold and put away these socks and this discarded bra. perhaps, she doesn't know where the laundry hamper is? but she puts other things like sheets in the hamper...so is this a passive aggressive move, to make me feel bad about leaving my clothes on the floor? maybe, and it's working.
third. there are pillows on the bed. regular sleeping and more or less decorative pillows. two and two. sleeping pillows get the sheet set pillow cases, to match the sheets; decorative pillows get the duvet pillow cases...to match the duvet. you get the point. there is also an extra pillow, which is this comfort memory foam whatever that doesn't match anything, but is part of the bed and the sheets, and either gets the sheet pillow or an extra pillow case i set out. the cleaning lady changes the sheets, it's very nice of her! but somehow the pillows are a constant battle of miss-match. it should be simple: 2 pillows for two pillow cases, 2 more pillows for the other 2 pillow cases, singular pillow gets its own pillow case. every time i come home after she's done, i begin this pillow puzzle. the math never adds up: it's 1 and 3 and 1, and 2 and 3 and 1, and 1 and 1 and 2.5. it's never just 2 and 2 but the wrong 2 (and i said the wrong 2 because the sleeping pillows are comfy, whereas the decorative pillows are just whatever, so it's kind of important what is what). how she gets what in where, i have no idea, and i have to pull everything off and figure out how to shove pillows in their correct respective cases, in a mathematical way that works. yes, i sound neurotic, but comfortable pillows are important. just as important as having someone clean your mess. happy cleaning!
